(THIS POST WAS WRITTEN FEB 1/09)
I faltered. I ate the 2 servings of spiced rice that I said I wouldn’t eat. Dammit! I noticed that I have intervals of cravings. I get a craving, it consumes my every thought for about 15 minutes, while I weigh all the alternatives and do the calorie math until I finally convince myself that caving down and eating won’t be thaaat bad… I think I know what serial killers go through.
When they meet someone kill-worthy, they start doing calculations and laying down several strategies about how to kill them and hide the body and evidence. And then after it’s all done, they’re like, “What have I DONE?!” And then they weep in sick repentence. Only to repeat the whole cycle all over again when they're bored.
…
I’m just assuming that’s what goes through the mind of killer before they murder someone. Funny how I can relate to sick people when my sickness (being a cow) whispers to me with it’s seductive voice.
Anyway…
Back to my point about my cravings coming in intervals. If I can last the 15 minute craving simply by keeping myself busy with writing here, or googling pictures of skinny chicks, or talking to my bf (who is model-worthy, I swear I have no idea why he’s with me), then I’m free for about an hour. I start getting cocky, telling myself this will be a piece of cake …. Mmm.. Cake… and before you know it, I start telling myself, “Ya know.. There’s a pack of macaroni in the snack drawer. If you pull it out and boil it real quick you can have it with black pepper and warm, buttery goodness.” And then I cave and while I’m eating I’m like, “Bleh. I gave up yet ANOTHER day of dieting for THIS? I HATE macaroni, what the hell is wrong with me?!”
Hehehe. It’s funny while I’m writing it but it’s sad at the same time considering I gave away my childhood to my weight problem with this kind of thinking. Ah well. I feel a change in the wind, says I. (Yes, I love Pirates of the Carribbean.)
I WILL be doing my strength training and I WILL be running on my treadmill for 20 minutes. The only thing I’m missing out on is the Stairmaster and Bike at the gym, which if you remember I said I was going to start February 4th. And that’s not even a big deal because they only add up to about 180 calories in 25 minutes anyway.
I am so excited to be on this diet while writing an online diary.
I will also be buying Wu-Yi Tea in a month because I believe it’s what helped me lose 8 pounds each of the weeks I dieted in the Summer and November. It’s supposed to raise your metabolism and has 0 cals. Also I will be buy cinnamon, as anaregzig.blogspot.com says it also boosts your metabolism. I’ll tell you about how it works out. If you’re interested at looking at their clinical studies, go to Wu-Yi Source.com. Make sure it says Source at the end of it, as there are many companies who are copy-cats who don’t offer the same exact product, just the name.
Stay Strong!
Jenny
When they meet someone kill-worthy, they start doing calculations and laying down several strategies about how to kill them and hide the body and evidence. And then after it’s all done, they’re like, “What have I DONE?!” And then they weep in sick repentence. Only to repeat the whole cycle all over again when they're bored.
…
I’m just assuming that’s what goes through the mind of killer before they murder someone. Funny how I can relate to sick people when my sickness (being a cow) whispers to me with it’s seductive voice.
Anyway…
Back to my point about my cravings coming in intervals. If I can last the 15 minute craving simply by keeping myself busy with writing here, or googling pictures of skinny chicks, or talking to my bf (who is model-worthy, I swear I have no idea why he’s with me), then I’m free for about an hour. I start getting cocky, telling myself this will be a piece of cake …. Mmm.. Cake… and before you know it, I start telling myself, “Ya know.. There’s a pack of macaroni in the snack drawer. If you pull it out and boil it real quick you can have it with black pepper and warm, buttery goodness.” And then I cave and while I’m eating I’m like, “Bleh. I gave up yet ANOTHER day of dieting for THIS? I HATE macaroni, what the hell is wrong with me?!”
Hehehe. It’s funny while I’m writing it but it’s sad at the same time considering I gave away my childhood to my weight problem with this kind of thinking. Ah well. I feel a change in the wind, says I. (Yes, I love Pirates of the Carribbean.)
I WILL be doing my strength training and I WILL be running on my treadmill for 20 minutes. The only thing I’m missing out on is the Stairmaster and Bike at the gym, which if you remember I said I was going to start February 4th. And that’s not even a big deal because they only add up to about 180 calories in 25 minutes anyway.
I am so excited to be on this diet while writing an online diary.
I will also be buying Wu-Yi Tea in a month because I believe it’s what helped me lose 8 pounds each of the weeks I dieted in the Summer and November. It’s supposed to raise your metabolism and has 0 cals. Also I will be buy cinnamon, as anaregzig.blogspot.com says it also boosts your metabolism. I’ll tell you about how it works out. If you’re interested at looking at their clinical studies, go to Wu-Yi Source.com. Make sure it says Source at the end of it, as there are many companies who are copy-cats who don’t offer the same exact product, just the name.
Stay Strong!
Jenny
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